Today I Will Not Worry Metlet

Story

Being from Southern California, I have grown up in the sunshine. My most favorite days are spent soaking up the golden rays and on cloudy days I often catch myself looking at the sky wondering and waiting for the sun to peek through. When it does, even for a couple minutes, in some strange way I feel relieved. When the sun is out and I find the pockets of light amongst the clouds, I feel like I can be my happiest and truest self. 

 In all honesty, I am a worrier. That is something I am continually working on in my life. I worry about what will happen to me once I graduate from college. Will I get a job? Am I even ready or capable of a “real job”? I worry about my relationships. Am I a good enough sister or is there more I could be doing to invest in my relationship with my brother? I worry about my future. Am I deserving enough to be loved forever? Could somebody really want to spend their life with me? My goodness, I even worry about where I’m going to park when I can’t find a parking spot in a lot.  

 It’s so easy to find things to worry about and get sucked into the black hole of doubt. What I have come to realize is that when I worry, I am standing under the clouds. I am shielding myself from my own happiness, when there is a world of goodness and hope in the sunlight. There is a family who loves me, companies who will believe in me, and there is a respect for myself that I am most worthy and deserving of the kind of love that little girls spend their days dreaming about. My goal is to choose the sunlight each day. To remind myself to believe in my own talents and values. To seek out the goodness each person and each experience brings to my life. To find the pockets of light, amongst the hard parts in life where I can be happy and my truest self and bask in those moments. Today, I will not worry, rather choose to believe that the future holds amazing plans for my life, much more amazing than I could have ever imagined.  

 -Sophia